This Christmas: Share a Story of Those Now Gone
Posted: Thursday, December 04, 2008
by Mike Fak
http://mikefak.com
The other evening I went to the local hospital for a photo op. The hospital's foundation has a thoughtful event every year to help people remember and honor family and friends who are no longer with them. Individuals or families can buy a light, or lights, in honor of someone special. Then while everyone holds a candle, the lights are turned on the trees.
It was of a ten year old little girl holding a candle for her namesake grandmother who died before she was born. The family said the youngster looks just like her grandmother and they frequently tell her stories about grandma so that the young girl can have a sense of the person she was named after. I have included the page in case you wish to look at the picture. http://www.lincolndailynews.com/images/120308pics/hospital%20001.jpg
The idea of the little girl remembering someone special she never knew hit a chord with me. My son never met my father and that has always saddened me. Tim is so much like his grandpa Mike that I am certain they would have been absolute best buddies.
In my mind I can see the two of them sitting at the table for hours arguing and laughing about politics, religion, the economy and everything else that mankind has ever pondered to ponder. Sadly I can only see this in my mind and not in reality.
As a young man I read many books on Native American culture and I really liked the fact that tribe elders pass down the stories of their ancestors to those younger. In a way, it not only maintains a verbal history of the tribe but also keeps alive those gone before to those who did not know their ancestors. I followed that philosophy with my son.
I have told my son many tales of his grandfather. The kind of stories that take my dad from being just another stranger in the family albums to a real person who lived and laughed and struggled through his life so many years ago.
Perhaps my son's favorite story of Grandpa Mike is one I included in my last book and also submitted to Searchwarp two years ago. It is archived at http://searchwarp.com/swa113754.htm
I know every year he brings this story up, or I do, and every year I tell it to him again.
This year as our families sit down for the holidays, there will be special loved ones not at that table with us. I am sure that for most of you those are the same circumstances.
I plan on sharing a few more stories about both mom and dad that some of the grandchildren won't know. That will start the ball rolling with everyone else to share a story or two as well. The ones I have in mind are funny and I hope they tell a little bit about our parents and grandparents to the family as well as giving everyone a laugh or two. Why then are there tears in my eyes as I type this?
This Article has been viewed 2,078 times. (Not updated in real-time.)
Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)Thanks Mike. I'm going to be sure to keep those good memories alive when our family is all together this Christmas.Glad to hear it Steve. We are the keepers of the flame for the youngsters.Mike
There was an accident that happened a long time ago with a cousin of mine and me. He died as a result of it and his mother never forgave me for it. The week before she died she wanted to see me to tell me she had a dream about her son and he told her it was not my fault that it was an accident and that she should stop blaming me for it. I don't think I have ever cried so hard in my life. She forgave me. She died a week later. I am burning a candle for her right now.Thank you for sharing Kay. I am glad that things are resolved in your family. We all have just so much time and it is good to heal.Mike
Mike, thank you for this article. Our youngest sister has done this so well with her children and now grandchildren concerning our parents. I forget that none of them knew our mother but her kids will talk about her as if they did. They will remind me of things about her because she has shared mother with them. Her son wasn't born before our dad passed on but this kid is so much like him and talks as if they've been fishing together. It's amazing what our sister has done. You are so full on, we must keep the memories alive for our kids. We are the keepers of the flame.I have seen that in my family too Avis. It brings those who are gone back into our families and it is a wonderful feeling.Mike
We want your comments! If you can read this, you don't have javascript enabled, so you can't use this comment system. Please enable javascript.