A Weather Report I Would Like To Write
Posted: Thursday, July 17, 2008
by Mike Fak
http://mikefak.com
We Illinoisans were hit with another massive storm last weekend. I'm not sure if it is global warming or climate change or the revenge of the polar bears but something isn't right with the weather in the Midwest. Now one of the things our on line paper can do that printed media can't is to post continuously during the day and night. Thus readers can catch up to the minute details of what is happening.
Anyway, I have been tempted on occasion to break from the norm on the follow up storm stories adding my own little bizarreness to the story. I haven't done so yet but if I had, I imagine this next report would be something like the way I would have written this storm story.
Magenta is not a good color when one looks at a weather map but there was plenty of the color Friday and Saturday throughout Central Illinois on the National Doppler Radar.
Friday afternoon started with round one going to Mother Nature as more than an inch of rain fell just before the Lincoln rush minute when commuters would all head home from work.
The worst was yet to come as a strong line of water heavy clouds came into the area just after 10; 00 p.m. The clouds were full of rain but no one has yet to explain how something we can't hold in our hand, such as a cloud, can have all that water inside of it.
At 1:57 a.m. the National Weather Service released a warning that already 4 to 5 inches of rain had fallen and the worst part of the storm had just arrived over Logan County. Water churned into the streets with such force that it actually was foaming as it headed for the storm drains. It looked like there had been an explosion at the Anheiser Bush plant and all the beer was being lost forever down the drains.
The rain, called "torrential" by the NWS continued to pour with a background of lightning that charged the atmosphere with a light show. The sky looked like a bad Fourth of July fireworks display that had only the color white in its arsenal.
At 2:07 a.m. residents in the central part of Lincoln could hear music being played from one of the church bell towers set off by the electricity in the air. Interestingly enough, as I looked out the window at the sheet of rain, I could swear that the song playing at the church was, "Michael row the boat ashore".
Looking hard onto the streets it was shocking to see animals in the neighborhood lining up in pairs as the rains flooded the streets. Some of them carried tiny suitcases but most carried a portion of one of my tomato plants for a snack on their expected voyage.
Not one to give up when she is on a roll, nature decided after a few hours respite to come back with an early Saturday morning rain that at times dropped rain again in waves of water. Still not finished with us, another deluge hit during the early afternoon, before moving on towards the east.
Although total rainfall amounts are varied across our area, estimates from five inches upwards of seven inches total for the less than 24 hour period have been coming into the LDN offices. My personal rain gauge, which is a fifty gallon garbage can, had over a foot of rain at the bottom and by anyone's standards including Noah's; that is just too much.
This report has been truncated as I must go and pump the rain water and your other stuff out of my basement again. Will the party or parties on my trunk line of the sewer system please stop eating nachos with jalapenos on them. This is getting old.
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Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)Mike, you are so right. That's a much better storm synopsis than we usually get. Maybe most weatherpeople take their craft too seriously. Considering the mercurial nature of the weather, a little lightness seems appropriate. DianneThanks Dianne. I always love how the day after they get a forecast completely wrong they never say a word about their gaff. They take themselves way too seriously. I don't.Thanks Mike
Fantabulous! You are the one most witty writer I have ever had the honor to read. I love all your articles. Some make me laugh so hard I have to cry. My husband thinks I'm 'freaking out' as our granddaughter calls it. Whatever, I don't care; I just love to read good writing and you never fail me.lol SandraWow, Sandra. Thank you so much for your kind words. They are appreciated coming from a writer of your caliber. Mike
Always funny, well written and informative. Thanks!Thank you Roschelle. I appreciate the kind words. Mike
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