New Reality TV Network Could Help Taxpayers
Posted: Monday, April 21, 2008
by Mike Fak
http://mikefak.com
I mentioned last week my contemplation of running for president. I still haven't made up my mind but I like this idea whether it's me or someone else in the White House.
My idea is to have a new branch of government that makes us money rather than spend any. What I'm talking about is a reality television network run by the oval office.
Whatever the name, here are my ideas for low cost reality shows that would bring in tons of viewers and thus revenue dollars to the federal budget.
One show would be like the bachelor or bachelorette series. We would take a newbie congress member who hasn't had a chance yet to grab any serious chunks of under the table remuneration. They will be courted by a dozen corporate lobbyists all trying to offer them something as they decide who will end up being their sugar daddy while on the hill. Of course every week we will see someone in tears booted off the show amidst anguished statements that they should have thrown in a few concubines with the bag of random sequence fifties in their last ditch offer.
I like the idea of having a beauty pageant that includes both the men and women on the hill. I think their having to strut their stuff in front of the whole country wearing a miniscule bit of clothing will wipe the arrogance right out of their demeanors. Then as they tour the country telling us they know what's best for us we can remind them we know what they look like in a thong and that should wipe the smugness right off their faces.
No doubt a combination talent show that pairs up American Idol and Dancing with the Stars all in one variety show should be a hit. After all, the politicians all know how to give us a song and dance routine every time we ask them a serious question so they should be really good at this. Plus the idea that we can kick a politician out of the show and Washington every week will probably set new ratings records.
There will be a great interest in a Survivor show I'm sure. What we can do is take a dozen of the sleaziest of the legislators to an island, bury them up to their necks in holes and watch as army ants come by looking for snacks. Granted the show will have a shelf life of only one episode but I'm willing to bet the ratings will be killer. Unless of course the bugs find the politicians as unpalatable as we do that is.
Of course the one natural program is a spin off show based on Deal or No Deal but that technically won't work. As soon as the politicians are offered any amount of money they will take the deal so there won't be much drama available for viewers.
Perhaps we can eventually spin off a drama on the Oval Office Network. The problem is the best name for such a show is already taken; Criminal Minds.
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Top-level comments on this article: (4 total)Just loved your approach to a sad topic '"leadership". I agree deal or no deal would not be too interesting. However, some of those other idea's, now they are interesting. I'm glad you have copy law protecting you. Yet, you may want to sell a sitcom to someone. I'd like one more like real life where the judge gets to put it to some poor slob while upholding the rights of the criminal or corporation. Good work as usual.Thanks RLM. Actually I plan to add all the TV judges to the Supreme Court when I'm President. They don't seem to have a political agenda and I like the way they tell people with inane thoughts to shut up and listen. That of course is what's wrong with our politicians. They are so busy talking they haven't heard a word we said. Thanks again. Mike
I would think that "Lost" would have been a good title for such a progam. Nice job, as usual...Boy you thought of another good one Ken. I will make you executive producer of it when I'm the Prez.. Thanks Mike
How 'bout, "The Biggest Loser". Maybe we could actually give all of these candidates "tests" or "challenges" to see if they can handle the pressure, then each week, America gets to vote one off. Whoever is still standing at the end, we keep for 4 years.I thought of the Biggest Loser, Jean. I thought the contestants could be told to shed lobbyists every week but then I realized no one would drop even one and the show would dump.. Thanks. Mike
This was a fun article to read. Thanks for writing it.Thank you for reading it, Becky. I try to have some fun on Searchwarp. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. Thanks again. Mike
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