“People Parts” Blunder into the News.
Posted: Monday, February 11, 2008
by Mike Fak
http://mikefak.com
The Federal Communications Commission is proving how inept they are at being our last bastion against rude and crude on our television stations. The FCC has proposed, which isn't the same as demanding, a $1.4 million dollar fine be levied against 52 ABC Television Network stations for showing a naked buttocks on the air. The kiester, that of a woman in the shower, was aired on "NYPD Blue" almost five years ago. Thank goodness the FCC doesn't run our 911 service.
Now the contention by the FCC is that the woman's "scenery" violated the prohibition of showing "sexual or excretory organs between the hours of 6 a.m. and 10 p.m."
ABC contends a woman's buttocks is not a sexual organ and I won't touch that debate with someone else's ten foot pole. I don't see how they can argue the latter fact since outside of politicians, who keep their waste in their brains, most of us do use our bottoms to delete ours.
I have always thanked God that my circumcision came in my first day of life as I didn't start keeping a journal till the next day. Certain things should not be remembered even if using hypnosis and a circumcision is right on the top of my list of things I don't want to recall. In St. Paul, The Minnesota Court of Appeals has ruled that a woman cannot sue a hospital for what she claims was a botched circumsicion on her newborn boy. The woman who settled with the doctor also wanted to go after the hospital but the court ruled only the "Mad Butcher of Minnesota" was responsible for a less than handsome reduction on the newborn.
The woman's attorney seems to be an expert in the field of slip-cumcisions and lawsuits as his website states he is an advocate for ensuring the "genital integrity" for all of mankind. Yeh buddy, where were you when the half blind doctor with the hedge clippers tore into me?
A woman in Raleigh North Carolina has received a setback from a boob of a judge who fails to recognize the importance of breasts to not only women but most men as well. The woman who was involved in an auto accident while on the job suffered severe personal front-end damage and wanted the insurance company to pay for her repairs. The woman had a breast augmentation previously and the crash caused one of her breasts to get a flat tire. The insurance company agreed to pay for this replacement but disagreed with her and her plastic surgeon that both of her mamarial accoutrements be replaced. In surgery the woman's plastic surgeon stated he saw a rippling in the other breast and decided it was best to change that breast implant as well before it started looking like a Louisiana Bloodhound's face.
The judge has ruled with the insurance company that a flat needs repair but a "soon to be flat" breast does not. It was stated the woman is a nursing assistant. It is hoped they meant in the medical profession and not in the baby care and feeding side of things.
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Top-level comments on this article: (4 total)hi mike, why watch the news when we have you? mike's Inside Edition. funny stuff, thanks for sharing, best regards, sueYou are exactly right Susan. I think a network WFAK would work well in this country. Thanks for reading. Mike
Mike, Funny article, yet true. I don't know whether to laugh, shake my head or cry. Isn't our legal system something? BarbaraThanks for reading Barbara. Yes the legal system is something. I'm just not sure what that is. I recommend that when in doubt you laugh. The alternative is to go nuts as I did. Mike
Mike, Well said, and I'm just wondering why violence on TV is OK but a naked tush is such an issue? Oh well. As an aside, I hope you don't mind that I used a Mike-ism in my article about McCain ( . . . Bush Blunder . . . ) under "Thoughts and Views." But I must confess, I only steal from the best. ;=)Thanks Jeff. You are so right about the violence and most of that is on reality shows. No problem borrowing from me. But I call them Fakisms.
i love the story it was great keep making more and tyiping DONT STOP!Thanks for the kind words Lawley. I hope you spend some time going through my archives. Hopefully there are a few that give you a laugh as well. As with everything I write. If you don't like it tell me, if you do like it, tell others. Mike
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